Ciao and Sacred Sunday:
Are you tired yet of reading, listening to sounds bites and watching you tube videos of the “slap heard around the world”?
Or is it like that sick feeling that sits in the pit of your belly when you don’t want to look at something disturbing, yet you’re compelled to return again and again to the event?
In some way the replay is you trying to make sense of what your eyes just witnessed, and your ears just heard. Searching for understanding that helps fit the shocking puzzle piece into the whole.
And yet, these types of occurrences are not cut and dried but nuanced and layered.
🙀I’ve been a fan of Will Smith and Chris Rock for many years. And still, like many of us, I was shocked at what took place at the Oscars last Sunday night.
Even with the sad fact that nothing much shocks me anymore.
I’m not here to judge or make commentary on the right or wrong of Will Smith’s behavior. Or whether Chris Rock’s joke was intentionally meant to hurt Jada Pinkett, or even if the joke was good or bad.
Nor am I qualified as a white woman to speak about the implications this event might have on the black community.
What I do want to share is my observation, as a coach and a long-time yoga teacher and student, of the shadow unchecked rearing its ugly head.
I haven’t read Will Smith’s memoir, WILL, which frankly might provide more insight into Will Smith’s history; as well as what might be underlying the simmering of emotionality that we witnessed boil over.
😳So, I’m only going on what I saw.
In looking at Will Smith’s face, observing his aggressive walk to the stage, shouting obscenities from his seat after his stormy march back, and then his subsequent pain-filled Oscar acceptance speech, the shadow loomed large.
I’ve been sitting with this all week. My heart is saddened for Will Smith, his wife and family, Chris Rock, the black community, and humankind.
What happened at the Oscars is one man’s shadow that was given reign over civility in a moment of passion. And in my humble opinion, is reflective of the “crazy” that in the past several years has been infecting the world.
Whether we agree with Will Smith’s actions or not, there is much to be learned from the interaction – that is if you’re willing to peer inside.
✅I want to make a point here – it’s important for you and I to wipe the “judgey” off our faces and take a good long look in the mirror.
So, I urge you to consider where you have allowed your darker nature to respond to a situation instead of your higher legacy self.
❓Where and when has your shadow led the way
❓How many times have you wished you could have a “do-over”
My friend, watching what happened last Sunday was shocking.
And yet, it was a gross demonstration of why I’m adamant that you and I shine the light of awareness into those cob-webby corners that we don’t want to look at. Those aspects of self that flippin’ scare us.
We all possess unsavory qualities that we consciously or unconsciously hide in the basement of our minds. No one is exempt from the multiplicity of being human.
❓Does what happened at the Oscars make Will Smith a bad person? Certainly not.
❓Would it behoove him to get radically honest with himself and do work around the anger that lies underneath the veneer of the cool got it all together funny dude?
Why? So, he can begin to heal from the inside out.
If we collectively become more aware of our individual saboteurs, shadows, lingering ghosts, whatever you want to call those parts of ourselves we hide from or don’t even see, we can somatically begin to feel when the ugly pain is arising.
And here’s the challenging but necessary part; we can then learn to PAUSE, take a breath, to make an informed choice instead of unskillfully reacting.
👉Denzel Washington cautioned Will Smith, “At your highest moment, be careful, that’s when the devil comes for you.”
Now, you could take that statement at face value as a religious person. Or you can also interpret it as a warning to beware the demons that reside within, your shadow.
However you internalize DW’s statement, it’s powerful. And one I believe you and I would do well to contemplate.
I don’t believe that it’s your job to destroy or “neutralize” your shadows. I believe that your job is to first become aware of your personal demons.
🌟As I remind you time and time again, then like the Buddha, invite those little devils to tea and find out what they have to offer you. What they’re showing you. What they can teach you.
So, you too can begin the journey of healing.
We’re not trying to “fix” the problem of being broken.
Facing these parts of ourselves helps us to heal the wounds so we can put ourselves back together again to be more than who we were before.
💯There’s true power in knowing what’s stirring beneath the surface of your ruminations and emotions.
💯There’s true power in turning your lower tendencies into creativity.
💯There’s true power in accepting and loving yourself fully.
💖With love and appreciation, xoxo Paulette
P.S. Shadow work need not be scary or difficult, and I can support you in that, it’s one of my great passions.